Building a Relationship
A Jewish wedding is a beautiful, blissful enterprise. More often than we realize, however, there are issues that arise amidst the stress of wedding preparation. New York State Licensed Psychotherapist and Marriage counselor outlines basic rules of meaningful relationship development.
The glow of a great relationship…
It could be yours! It should be yours!
Mazal Tov dear
Mazal Tov dear Choson and Kallah!
Hopefully your engagement is moving along smoothly as you prepare for your life together as husband and wife.
Sometimes, more often than we realize, there are issues that arise. It is not unusual for differences between you to surface either during the engagement, shortly after the wedding or during Shanah Rishonah. After all, you both came from different families with different expectations and different rules.
So how do you keep and enhance the glow of your partnership. The key is in the word “partnership”. A marriage is created by two individuals who learn to be best friends. Best friends develop trust, respect each other, learn about each other, and cultivate a communication that brings them closer and closer.
What are some suggestions for navigating the engagement and first year of marriage.
- Listen more than you talk
- Build each others’ self-esteem with honest praise, compliments and appreciations
- Offer 5 compliments for every criticism
- If you make a mistake in the relationship, acknowledge it and correct it
- Recognize issues when they arise and work as a team to discuss them without blaming each other
- This is just a taste of the potential of the marriage you can co-create. Whether it is problems of communication, religious observance, money, in-laws, post-partum depression or other emotional issues- if you honor your partner, you can be the smiling couple to whom we say Mazel Tov.
By Tina Kahn